Avoidance By Viggo Johansen, Taoist Teacher & Cognitive Therapist

From a certain point of view you will se that all human emotions are expressions of attachment – and that attachment operates on the energy of fear.

The fear of utter meaninglessness is the core fear sustaining all other fears. Untill it is confronted and dealt with, it will be with you as the driving force behind all your activities.

From this perspective all human action is avoidance. It's motion is always running away, even when you are running towards. That is, your life may well be constituted by moving in the direction of this and that goal, but always because of… "I want this, because…" Not because of itself.

And as long as you move around because of, you are moving in fear. So running towards is running away. As long as you act and live on this basis, you will not be able to live your core values. When you do not live your core values, you do not live. When you do not live, then life appears as misery. And when life is misery, then death is misery.

Discovering and understanding how strategies of avoidance play out in your life may well be the most interesting, valuable and life-affirming thing you ever did.

Avoidance is the one and only destructive force in your life. Simple as that. It’s what hinders you on all levels, from the small self-talk where you explain and justify your own behavior, to always waiting untill tomorrow before pursuing your real dream and life’s purpose.

Avoidance is what stops you from dealing with necessary conflict – at work, with friends and in relationship.  And with strangers. It’s what makes you look to others before you speak your mind, to make sure that you will be accepted by the group. It’s what makes you keep silent when you would like to speak, stay motionless when you would like to dance, look away when you would like to connect and stay passive when responsibility is called for.

Avoidance is also operating when you blame others, or even life itself, for your misery. Avoidance kills your potential and drains your life force.

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Viggo Johansen is co founder with Andrew Fretwell of the White Tiger Company
an organization dedicated to empowerment of men.

™
© 2008 Andrew Fretwell